Russia Revisited

Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest. 

Joshua 1:9

It has been ten years since we stood in the Cheboksary Judge's court room and listened to her
read the Resolution declaring Robert and Katherine Sanford the legal and binding parents of
William Alexander Sanford, Peter Sergei Sanford, Adrianna Ludmila Sanford, and Zachary Ivan Sanford at 8:45 A.M. on Wednesday, November 12, 2003.

Here is a bit of the exciting story of our becoming a family of 13 those many years ago...
  
In April 2003, we went to learn more details regarding a Russian hosting program. During the presentation, in response to Bob's question, we found out that there would be very little additional cost to adopting more than one child, so he asked to look at photos. When he saw the photo of this sibling group the Lord spoke to heart saying, "If you do not adopt them, no one will." He knew then and there these were his children. We learned later that if they had not been adopted through the hosting program that year, they were going to be split-up. Only the twins, Luda and Vanya, would be available for adoption. Sasha and Sergei would be taken off the adoption registry. 

Their pictures were displayed on our refrigerator for months while we waited for August to come. 

Finally the day arrived, the four children were here for the ten-day hosting program.

The very next day we spoke at a Lifesong for Orphans adoption conference regarding adoption older children. It is something we know a little about. :-)

The 10 days went by very quickly. We all had a wonderful time. The children learned a little English and we learned useful Russian phrases like "moy rookie" = 'wash your hands'. Never in that time did we talk about their being adopted, as it was not allowed, but we think they suspected.

All too soon it was time for the children to go back and our for paperwork to be processed.

Finally, the call came we could go to adopt our children and bring them home forever!

Friday, November 7, the plane lifted off right on time. At the moment the wheels left the soil Katherine burst into tears at the realization that she was no longer on the same soil as her precious seven children and that their separation was complete for a time. 'Have I not commanded thee? Be strong....' ran through her heart as her husband prayed fervently for her spirit to be at peace. This would not be the last time this verse would serve to keep us at peace.

We landed in Russia a half-hour late due to a hold in Zurich, Switzerland at 4:00 on Sat. Nov 8th. Walking down the gangplank Katherine spoke to lighten the mood 'We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto!' We both laughed a nervous laugh. All six of our bags arrived with us which was answer to prayer number 2. Number 1 was that we would arrive safely in Russia, which we did, just very tired.

After going through Customs, where we were not even questioned or looked at funny, we meet our driver. Much to our delight it was Dima. His name and reputation proceeds him as any family who had him as their driver in Moscow just loved him. We had been told in the USA that our driver was to be someone else, so we marveled at the blessing of getting the 'famed' Dima.

On the way to Oxanna's flat, our hostess for our stay in Moscow, we picked up Katya who has been the translator of all of our documents. After arriving at Oxanna's and seeing our room, Katya took the big amount of cash we had to carry on our person. But before leaving she wanted to ask us some questions regarding English words. So what is the difference between slap, punch, hit, spank, whack, smack, (and a couple others I cannot remember)? It was fun exploring our language with her.

Oxanna is an awesome cook and after a very filling dinner, she and Dima took us on a tour of Moscow looking primarily at the architecture, and actually stopped to have us walk on Red Square. It was great seeing the city at night all lit up like Chicago, but with little sleep on the plane we mostly wanted to go to bed. Yet our hostess and driver would not hear of it until we had had some Moscow Ice Cream. It was very good, but more so was the sleep that followed.

On Sunday, November 9, we spent the morning at the Moscow Flea Market, then went to a Electronic Mall to get some Russian videos, DVD's and music cassette tapes for the children, along with a trip to the local market (grocery) to get some candies. Back to Oxanna's for dinner, a rest, then off to the train station.

Before boarding the train at 6:00 P.M. for the overnight trip we meet Marina, our adoption coordinator, and Natasha, our translator for court. Marina shared with us right away that our four children are so excited about our coming and that they have been begging her for weeks to let them know when it would be. Answer to prayer number 3. Of course she was unable to tell them anything for sure except to be patient. But our hearts nearly burst with joy that they wanted us to come! For when they left us in August they were very stoic and we were not sure of their hearts. And since the oldest had to go to court and state for the court whether he wanted to be adopted or not, this news from Marina squelched all our fears. They wanted us!

We did not sleep much on the train. As the sun came up we were able to see the country side. When we saw the first set of 15 or so houses we thought it was a small children's park that had been abandoned, but when we came upon the next group we realized these were people's homes each about the size of a medium shed. It was a bit shocking and humbling. We arrived in Cheboksary at 8:00 A.M., went directly to the hotel and settled into our suite of two bedrooms flanking a nice size sitting area with frig., TV, and couch with a large window in all three rooms. It was much nicer then we ever expected, especially the bathrooms.

THE MOMENT WE WERE WAITING FOR! At 11:30 we got into two taxies (the size and style of an old Volvo) to go the Cheboksary Children's Home. Bob was riding up front in Sergei's taxi, the second vehicle. Katherine was in the back with the video camera ready to go. As we drove up to the home, a boy came running across the road to go into the building between the two taxies. Before entering he turned and looked at the second car. The look on his face was priceless! The boy was Sergei (Peter) and he saw his Papa. Bob stepped out of the car and Sergei ran into his arms. It was awesome! Then Bob spied a boy sweeping up leaves in front of the first taxi. He called Sasha's name and a smile spread across the boy's face. Sasha (William) was more shy about coming up to us, which had us wondering (but he melted all those concerns later). Both boys went to eat lunch and we were escorted to Nina's office. Shortly after getting settled and sharing some news about a little boy named Anton from the same orphanage, and adopted by our good friends in August, the door opened and a bright faced little girl bounded into the room running into her Papa's arms. Her giggles and huge smiles told all in the room this child was delighted to see us. Luda (Adrianna) then went to get her brothers. Vanya (Zachary) followed her in, his face radiating with his smile. He snuggled in to our hugs, warming our hearts, as he was not as affectionate when in America. In came Sergei again and we asked where is Sasha, so they all went to get him. The three returned saying he is looking for something. To our great amusement and joy, he finally comes wearing the jacket which we had sent with him back to Russia. So he did remember and did want us.

Once we had all the children in the room, Katherine asked through the translator, so do you want to be adopted by us and go to America? We watched their faces as the translator spoke and the smiles that spread on all their faces told us volumes before we heard their four collective and hardy 'DA's!' meaning yes! Answer to pray number 4. The translator-Natasha, the coordinator-Marina, the inspector-Valentina, and the orphanage director-Nina talked a bit more as we took some pictures of the children, then all 10 of us loaded into those two taxies to go back to the hotel for lunch and more visiting.

Upon arrival we first took the children up to our hotel room to change their clothes, and to give them their gifts. Each child received a backpack full of toys, coloring things, and their watches that they had bought when in America and left for us to bring. When we joined the other four ladies for lunch, we were in for another blessing. Our four children would not eat until Bob prayed. They had remembered that that was our way. It did make the others a little uncomfortable, but we think it was a good sign to them as well.  After a very filling meal everyone came up to our room so that they could see the children's gifts. Luda also had fun showing Nina and Valentina the picture album of their visit to America. We do not know when it happened, but Valentina fell in love with our little family that day and became a dear friend to us while we were there. She was an important figure in advocating our adoption before the Judge, which we also learned was a good friend of hers. It was precious to us to hear Valentina stand before the Judge in court and tell of how Luda had showed her pictures of this family and named off all the children as if she had just been with them. Time had not dimmed Luda's memory of her soon-to-be siblings in America.

After a light dinner, Marina and Natasha came to our room to discuss the court with us. This is also the time when they told our children that we would like to give them new names when we adopt them and explained to them why we picked the name we did. All four children loved their names and the reasons. After more talk they left and we all went to bed. When the children finally fell asleep they rested peacefully. We on the other hand had a restless sleep. For the next day was Court!

The room was large with many rows of seats for spectators, but there were only seven of us waiting for the Judge to enter. The court reporter, prosecutor, Nina, Valentina, Natasha-our translator and lifeline to all who spoke Russian, Bob and Katherine. Bob could not help but notice that he was the only male in the group. The door opened, we stood, and in walked the 5' tall, 100 lb, 38 yr old, no children, black robed JUDGE! Her slow steady walk with high heels echoing sent chills to our spine. 'Have I not commanded thee? Be strong....' After some formalities, Bob stood to deliver to the court our family information and the request for our adoption of the four Pavlov Siblings. The prosecutor then took a turn at questioning him. Her biggest questions were is your income steady, what do you do on 700 sq meters of land (in other words, are the children being adopted for hard labor on a farm?!), and since many of our pictures have us all dressed alike, is that something all our children agree to or is it forced? To which he answered, "The T-shirts were very inexpensive and it gave us a way to keep track of all the children in public. It also gave all the children a since of unity as family, and everyone who saw us could not tell the difference between the American or Russian children until they spoke!"

Katherine's turn was next to talk about being the mother of 11 children and all that would entail. It was a short speech to Bob's long one. Now the questions were directed to learn more about American adoptions, which we had done four years ago, homeschooling, and managing a home with a large family. We later learned that the Judge was so interested in us as a family that this line of questioning caused her to lose all track of time and our morning court time ran over. We broke for lunch, which we had with the children at the hotel. Then back to court in a smaller room, were Nina and Valentina gave their reports about our children.

During this time, Marina took our four children to have their passport photos done and to deliver Sasha and Sergei to court for them to testify. Sasha came in shy but strong and answered the Judges questions. Which in the course of these questions he stated yes he knew who we were and our names Bob and Katherine. The Judge said, 'Bob? Who is Bob!' Natasha told her that Robert is Bob. It was cute. In response to another of the Judge's questions, Sasha told her that he chose to call us Mama and Papa when in America and no one made him do it. She asked if he wanted to change his name and he said 'Yes.' She also told him that he had to obey the laws of his new State (USA) and his parents. And that his parents will punish him if he does wrong, how did he feel about that? He said he was ok with that, but that he did not plan to do anything wrong. How we smiled at that one!! Sasha sat down and then Sergei came in. His little heart was so overwhelmed. The Judge started asking questions which he answered slowly, Valentina tried to encourage him. But when the Judge asked if he was going to be able to learn English, he just stood there for what seemed an eternity then burst into tears and ran out our the court room. Bless the Judge's heart, she called an immediate recess, walked out of the room, then we both burst out of the door to grab Sergei up and calm his heart with hugs and kisses. Sasha was right there with us. Sergei calmed down, hung on to Bob, sitting as close as he could to him for the rest of court. He did need to answer a few more questions which he did well.

The Prosecutor then stood to give her finally report and recommendation that this adoption should proceed, but that our situation was not extra-ordinary, and therefore she recommended that the 10-day waiting period not be waived. To which Nina jumped up and declared to the Judge that this was indeed extra-ordinary and that having the children wait 10 days in the orphanage would totally destroy her schedule, break these four children's hearts, and hurt the hearts of the children in the orphanage who would see this Mama and Papa everyday reminding them of what they do not have. Valentina jumped up right behind that and stated her reasons for believing that ours was extra-ordinary and that this added stress would also not benefit the children. Then Bob spoke his closing words, "I know the final decision rests in the Judge's hands, and even after everything that was said today in court our resolve to adopt the four Pavlov Siblings has not lessened but has only strengthened. And no matter the final decision regarding the 10-day waiting period we were prepared to do what it took to adopt these children." Katherine mainly stated that ,"Although our children shed no tears with our coming to Russia to adopt their new siblings, they did shed tears thinking that we would not return in a timely matter. And that I had not been away from my two six year olds since they were adopted four years ago and they needed me to come home to them as soon as possible."

The Prosecutor tried to pull one more rabbit out of her hat. She asked the Judge if a copy of the LSS Adoption Agency's Accreditation Letter on file with the Russia government was in our dossier. Which is was not. It has never been asked for in court in the 9 years that LSS has been working adoption in Chuvashia. Natasha ran out of the court room called Marina who said it would be faxed right away. The Judge closed court at 4:55 P.M. stating if that copy was not on her desk by 8:15 A.M. tomorrow this adoption would not proceed. 'Have I not commanded thee? Be strong....'

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified;

do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9

We were escorted out of the courtroom as the building was being shut down for the night, 5:00 sharp! Since we did not totally understand everything that was going on because of the language barrier, we felt confused and disappointed. Adoptions are only supposed to take a few hours in one day, not go into two! Why has the court sessions taken so long anyway, that we could not have finished today?And the Judge could have just asked for verbal confirmation of our Adoption Agency's license to work in Russia without needing to see an actual copy, so why did she extend the court to the next day? Were they looking for a reason to stop this adoption or hold us for the 10 days? Were we not going to be able to leave for Moscow tomorrow night? 'Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged.....'

As we walked down the Chuvashia Supreme Court House stairs holding the hands of our two older boys, we saw and heard across the parking lot two wonderful little voices calling "Mama y Papa." It was music to our ears and hearts, washing away any doubts and concerns from the day. These children know who we are, the Lord had written it on their hearts! And since He is the Supreme Judge His ruling had already been passed for that day and all we needed to do was go through the formalities of tomorrow's court.

After lots of hugs, we squeezed into the taxi to head back to the hotel to change into more comfortable clothing. Marina had made reservations for dinner at a near by restaurant which was designed and decorated to look like an authentic Chuvashia home. It was to be our celebration dinner of the finalization of our adoption, but that would have to wait. The meal was delicious and the children really enjoyed the whole event. That night the children all slept together on pallets in the main sitting area. It was precious. It was the first time they have all slept in one room in 8 years.

The next morning began early with a yogurt and juice for breakfast. Natasha greeted us in the hotel lobby waving a faxed copy of the Accreditation Letter, nothing was going to stop this adoption if she had anything to do with it, and then off we went to the Court House at 7:45 A.M. We arrived early, but the Judge now had two copies of that Letter. Court began and the Judge showed the Prosecutor the Letter, who was satisfied. Then the Judge recessed Court to convene in 20 minutes. Valentina came up to us during that time, seeing our nervousness about the 10-day waiting period, and said in broken English, "No 10-day waiting period for you."

The "all rise" was spoken and in walked the Judge, her heels once again echoing the room. She walked to the bench, remained standing and proceeded to read the Adoption Resolution. (The Prosecutor was curiously absent.) Natasha translated for us as we all stood and listened. It was quite moving to hear the Judge read the decree declaring us the legal and binding parents of these four siblings. It was touching to hear our names and the children's new names intermixed with all the Russian words. Bob reached over and grabbed Katherine's hand. But the big hand squeeze, huge smiles, and prayers of thanks came when she declared that this adoption DID have extra-ordinary circumstances and that she was waiving the 10-day waiting period. The Judge finished reading the Resolution, declared this court ended, and walked out of the room. We hugged each other then the other three ladies, Natasha, Valentina, and Nina. All was done by 9:00 A.M. Then Natasha hurried off to translate our Resolution and we headed to tell the children the good news.

As we came into the hotel the children came off the elevator hollering our names, and running into our arms. They knew it was done and they were going to America! We were a noisy bunch going back up to our room. It was then that we gave them the adoption gifts we had brought. Adrianna received a locket with Mom and Dad's pictures in it, exactly like the ones her four sisters received over 3 years ago at their adoption. William, Peter, and Zachary received dog tags with their new names and birth dates on it, just like the ones their two older brothers wear, which these three had admired in August. They all were very happy with their gifts.

At 12:30 we head to the Cheboksary Children's Home for one last visit and to deliver gifts to the children, staff, and Nina. It was such a blessing for us to be able to see were the children have lived for the last 5 years. We took pictures of them by their beds and with their caretaker. We also took lots of video of their rooms and the facility. It was not as bad as we expected and the rooms had very much of a home feeling. William was the only one to really leave a friend there. The others showed no attachment to any of the other children. Yet, we know that they were happy and well cared for by all that we saw there and how they are with us.

Back at the hotel, Valentina, Nina, Natasha, Marina, Valentina's adult daughter Lilianna, and Sasha (who was to escort us back to Moscow on the train that night) joined us for a celebration lunch in the hotel restaurant. Valentina and Nina even provided a beautiful cake to commemorate the occasion. It was a nice ending to an incredible 3 days in Cheboksary.

Back to Moscow on the 6:20 P.M. train from Cheboksary, was a much busier and louder ride then the trip out. The children were so excited and could hardly stay put. Sasha, our escort for the trip, joined us for sandwiches, yogurt, bananas, apples and water which Marina sent along with us for dinner. We learned that Sasha teaches English to children and adults. Katherine grilled him with questions for teaching ESL and Sasha was more than willing to share his techniques which he had developed. We all slept well on the sleeper beds. Papa and the boys in one room with Mama and Adrianna (along with the suitcases) in the other.

Thursday started early with Dima picking us up at the station. Breakfast was good at Oxanna's. She enjoyed meeting the children and feeding their hearty appetites. Then we loaded up and went to see the Doctor for the exit physicals. Dr. Boris was wonderful and fantastic with children. The rest of the day was spent sightseeing, visiting an underground mall and museum near the Kremlin. Peter was not feeling well and when we returned to Oxanna's he took a good nap. After another great dinner we headed to the Moscow Circus. It was like watching a one ring Barnum & Bailey Circus. The children enjoyed the monkey and apes the most.

Friday we visited the Kremlin behind the walls and tour several Sercuffs (Churches) that were inside. The artwork was amazing. We also went to The Cathedral of Christ the Savior which was another feast for the eyes regarding magnificent paintings. From there we rushed to the American Embassy so that we could sit and wait for our names to be called. That time was also a very special event for us as Americans. It was wonderful to be amongst 'our own' even though they were strangers, which of course did not last long. We were very quickly engaged in conversation as we made quite a spectacle of four older children and two adults dressed in our 'going to America' matching clothes in a crowd of babies and parents. The greatest blessing though was being able to speak with folks and being completely understood and understanding them. It was our observation during our week in Russia that language is the heart of an individual. Without the ability to communicate we are lost and alone. The lack of ability to read and speak Russian, made us physically sick at times. We are thankful for having experienced this first hand so that we now better understand how our children are feeling in America.

There was one moment of trepidation during our Embassy visit. When the official was reviewing our paperwork, we discovered that they had William's birth date wrong on his visa. The first thought that ran through our minds and hearts were that it was going to take another day for them to run the paperwork and print a new visa and we could not leave tomorrow morning. Yet, all it took was $335 and another 15 minutes of waiting, then we were able to go our merry way. 'Be not terrified; do not be discouraged...'

Evening was spent packing and relaxing, as well as eating another very filling meal. Then off to bed.

We awoke at 3:00 A.M. and by 3:30 we were headed to the airport about an hour away. The roads were empty, so Dima was able to make good time. Waiting to board our plane, we met three other American families in Russia for adoption. One family beat us by adopting five older children, one three sibling group and a two sibling group. The neatest part was how much the three older boys in their teens looked just like their new dad and were as tall as him.  We all went to Zurich together, then went to our separate flights for the USA. For each of us it was like saying 'goodbye' to old friends though we had hardly spoken. We believe that is because we had shared in an incredible life changing experience that can only be understood by those who have gone through it.

Our four children did fantastic on the flights. On the first leg to Zurich they were awake the whole time. On the second leg the three boys took a long and hard nap. Adrianna was more restless and did not sleep much. They all enjoyed the ride and the food. They tried to watch the movies, but the seats in front were too high and they got tired of kneeling as well as not understanding the words. They mostly drank and went to the bathroom. It least it gave them something to do! On a couple of these trips to the middle of the plane Bob would escort Zachary, and he would get into conversations with those in line. How he beamed as he told our story. He never tired of sharing it with anyone who asked. The stewardesses were also very taken with our four and the story of our seven at home. They presented us with a box of 50 silver wrapped chocolate circles that they use for first class. It was quite a surprise and honor. As our plane landed in Chicago, IL at 12:55 P.M., our four children became American citizens!

   

Upon disembarking we had to go through a passport check, then go to immigration which had us waiting for about a half-hour before they started to call the children up. During that time an airport official collected our luggage and brought it to us. Unfortunately, that caused us to go through another line of customs than the one the other passengers of our flight went through. We know the rest of our family was there and waiting because an airport personal who was going to her job recognized our clothes matching the ones in the lobby and said "that your family is waiting for you." That blessed our hearts and made us more anxious to get through immigration. Finally, we could go, and customs took no time except to lift our bags to go through the x-ray. Then we were on the move.

How my heart sank when we burst through the doors and there were no blue shirts! We walked, searching, then Bob saw them at the other door and started calling. What a joyous reunion! Katherine cried as soon as she saw Melinda and Cassandra coming towards her followed by the rest of the children along with her mom and dad.

All the tired feelings just melted away in the hugs and kisses of these children. From the moment they saw their brothers, William and Peter would not leave Josh and Garrison's side. And those two big boys did not mind it a bit. Adrianna was happy to see all of the girls, but stayed closest to Melinda. Zachary just enjoyed being with us all.  We all loaded into the van and headed to McDonald's! We had been promising our four since they saw the McD's in Cheboksary and with everyone they pointed out in Moscow (it seemed like there was one every mile, just like home!) that we would eat there in America. Their eyes brightened when they saw those Golden Arches. It just goes to show they were destined to be Americans one day and here it was.

The greatest joy though came when we were finally home. The four children went through the whole house to see all was the same as they remembered. William and Peter were excited to learn that they could sleep on the top bunks. They had been denied this honor when here in August. Adrianna had learned in Cheboksary that her bed had been moved from the three older girls room to Victoria and Rebecca's. She was a bit miffed by that information. Yet, upon arriving home and seeing her bed in that room, she showed nothing but happiness with her new place in the house. After a nice hot shower for all six of us and a snack for supper, we had a time of gift giving. All 11 children were blessed by that time of sharing, but for us as parents, it was a time of marveling.

Just 7 months ago we learned of these four orphan children needing a family. Just 3 months ago they were in our home for a ten-day visit, which was wonderful. Just 8 days ago we were leaving our seven children to fly to a foreign country to adopt four siblings. Just 5 days ago we saw the children for the first time and it became their 'Gotcha Day'. Just 3 days ago four Pavlovs became four Sanfords. Just 16 hours ago we were in Russia. Just 7 hours ago we landed in America. And just 2 hours ago we arrived home a family of 13!

...for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest. 

Joshua 1:9

Where are they today...

2003 - Luda (9 yo), Sasha (12 yo), Sergei (10 yo)

2013 - Adrianna (19 yo), William (22 yo), Peter (20 yo)

Over the last ten years there have been many significant joys, but there have also been many trials and heart-aches. Sadly, three of our four Russian-born children have left our family in rebellion. Two of them refuse to talk with us; only William, thus far, has sought reconciliation as he learned 'out in the world' that he 'had it really good' at home and was grateful for what we did for him. And though he wants us as parents now, he still does not want to do the 'Christian thing'.

William has a nice job with benefits at a financial institution, Peter works for a modular home construction company, and Adrianna works as a maid for a very wealthy family. They are happy and enjoy their many friends. 


   

                 2003 - Vanya (9 yo)                                          2013 - Zachary (19 yo)

 

Zachary had been placed in the orphanage at 16 months of age (with his twin sister) and was later sent away to live out the rest of his life in a sanitarium due to learning disablities. But now he is finishing high school (a miracle in its self considering his beginnings), and looking forward to going to tech school to become an auto mechanic upon graduation. 

As their parents, we are thankful for the time the Lord gave us with them; to love them, give them a high school education, teach them of Christ's work on the cross, though they reject it for themselves, and to give them a future apart from living on the streets in Russia after they turned 18 years old. 
 

Even though things did not turn out as we had hoped when we sat in that courtroom 10 years ago, we would still do it again because we love our children and have been very blessed to have the opportunity to be an important part of their lives. They have taught us how to have biblical love, how the Lord makes 'all things work together for good', and that our hope is found in Christ alone. 

May God receive all the glory!